Jesus Robin. I am sorry. The man you responded to when you were 15 with, “no sure,” especially. And, please be easy on yourself - you were 15. Secondly, this is intersectional - as a woman because we are taught to “answer nice,” and then as being black wherein you are expected to NOT respond with anger and hide your fear when bullied and preyed upon by racist assholes. That situation alone is traumatizing.
As far as all the blue lives matter bullshit and confederate flag waving, yeah, I notice. And I have the privilege of not being as afraid as you do. But lemme tell, some of us white folks ARE afraid. We DO notice. And it bristles my back. And even ONE American flag hanging in someones home gives me pause because that flag signals unquestioned patriotism to a broken, un free and lacking in liberty-for-all system that upholds white supremacy and thinks that by white-washing our history, our children won’t “know any better.” But, trust me. These kids know. They’re smart and I have so much faith in them.
So please know, you are not alone in this. I can’t (and won’t!) speak for all white folks, but know that I, my family, and my friends SEE and feel with you and we’re trying to speak up where we can.
Be safe and keep using your “common sense” as you said, and I hope one day you and we all will be ACTUALLY free to take pictures of, question, and respect those who are trying to serve us.
It's wild - when I think about the man, I still feel upset about the way I responded. I have to remind myself that I was a kid. The intersectionality of being a girl/woman (and a Black one) never occurred to me until I read your comment. Thank you for that.
I've always wondered if non-Black folks felt a way about the flag BS or even noticed it. And you're right, these kids DO know. Thank you for seeing me and speaking up - it really does make a difference.
I spent most of my life ignoring all the flags because I'm a white woman in the U.S., so - why pay attention? Well, I pay attention now! And for the last few years, my anxiety around all the flags has increased significantly. Now that I know the brutality they represent, I can't unsee it. I don't want to unsee it. I have stopped saying the Pledge of Allegiance because What In the Actual Fuck is going on with that piece of nonsense?! 🤔 It's bad. We have to get you to Mexico!
Kay, exactly! Once you know, you can't unsee it. But some folks seem to be able to or, they just don't give a damn. The POA is such trash. I can't imagine ever making my Black child (if I had one) say one word of it. It's so fucking bad. I can't wait to get to Mexico, for real. ❤️
Thank you, Robin. I was in a relationship with a Trinidadian woman who opened my eyes to my white male privilege a few decades ago. She pointed out that when she was shopping with me, or her previous white husband, clerks treated her like a respected customer, but when shopping alone, she was eyed suspiciously. I simply had no idea that I was privileged. I had worked hard for everything I had, growing up middle class in lily white neighborhoods. High School was the first time I interacted with black people. Looking back, I can plead ignorance - the privilege was there, always, so ignorable. Like The Force in Star Wars: "These are not the droids you're looking for." It was absence of diversity that blinded me to my privilege. I personally apologize for my white ancestors' prejudice, judgement, and harm they caused to you and your ancestors. I pray for a day when we simply celebrate our differences and don't judge each other. Non-Judgement Day is Coming! Peace unto you.
Lion, thank you for sharing so openly. I've had similar experiences with a white a partner from the past. It wasn't that she didn't care to learn, she just had no idea because it wasn't a part of her world - much like yours. When white people tell me they've struggled with poverty, I empathize. And then I ask "but was it made 10x harder because of the color of your skin?" That often opens their eyes to a different perspective. I appreciate your words. My faith in this country is thin. However, I too hold hope for a world without judgment one day.
Jesus Robin. I am sorry. The man you responded to when you were 15 with, “no sure,” especially. And, please be easy on yourself - you were 15. Secondly, this is intersectional - as a woman because we are taught to “answer nice,” and then as being black wherein you are expected to NOT respond with anger and hide your fear when bullied and preyed upon by racist assholes. That situation alone is traumatizing.
As far as all the blue lives matter bullshit and confederate flag waving, yeah, I notice. And I have the privilege of not being as afraid as you do. But lemme tell, some of us white folks ARE afraid. We DO notice. And it bristles my back. And even ONE American flag hanging in someones home gives me pause because that flag signals unquestioned patriotism to a broken, un free and lacking in liberty-for-all system that upholds white supremacy and thinks that by white-washing our history, our children won’t “know any better.” But, trust me. These kids know. They’re smart and I have so much faith in them.
So please know, you are not alone in this. I can’t (and won’t!) speak for all white folks, but know that I, my family, and my friends SEE and feel with you and we’re trying to speak up where we can.
Be safe and keep using your “common sense” as you said, and I hope one day you and we all will be ACTUALLY free to take pictures of, question, and respect those who are trying to serve us.
It's wild - when I think about the man, I still feel upset about the way I responded. I have to remind myself that I was a kid. The intersectionality of being a girl/woman (and a Black one) never occurred to me until I read your comment. Thank you for that.
I've always wondered if non-Black folks felt a way about the flag BS or even noticed it. And you're right, these kids DO know. Thank you for seeing me and speaking up - it really does make a difference.
I spent most of my life ignoring all the flags because I'm a white woman in the U.S., so - why pay attention? Well, I pay attention now! And for the last few years, my anxiety around all the flags has increased significantly. Now that I know the brutality they represent, I can't unsee it. I don't want to unsee it. I have stopped saying the Pledge of Allegiance because What In the Actual Fuck is going on with that piece of nonsense?! 🤔 It's bad. We have to get you to Mexico!
Kay, exactly! Once you know, you can't unsee it. But some folks seem to be able to or, they just don't give a damn. The POA is such trash. I can't imagine ever making my Black child (if I had one) say one word of it. It's so fucking bad. I can't wait to get to Mexico, for real. ❤️
Thank you, Robin. I was in a relationship with a Trinidadian woman who opened my eyes to my white male privilege a few decades ago. She pointed out that when she was shopping with me, or her previous white husband, clerks treated her like a respected customer, but when shopping alone, she was eyed suspiciously. I simply had no idea that I was privileged. I had worked hard for everything I had, growing up middle class in lily white neighborhoods. High School was the first time I interacted with black people. Looking back, I can plead ignorance - the privilege was there, always, so ignorable. Like The Force in Star Wars: "These are not the droids you're looking for." It was absence of diversity that blinded me to my privilege. I personally apologize for my white ancestors' prejudice, judgement, and harm they caused to you and your ancestors. I pray for a day when we simply celebrate our differences and don't judge each other. Non-Judgement Day is Coming! Peace unto you.
Lion, thank you for sharing so openly. I've had similar experiences with a white a partner from the past. It wasn't that she didn't care to learn, she just had no idea because it wasn't a part of her world - much like yours. When white people tell me they've struggled with poverty, I empathize. And then I ask "but was it made 10x harder because of the color of your skin?" That often opens their eyes to a different perspective. I appreciate your words. My faith in this country is thin. However, I too hold hope for a world without judgment one day.