Let's Talk About Poverty Shame
The (Missing)Teeth Edition
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Damn you, Ohio.
For the past 3 years I’ve driven 6 hours to Michigan regularly to buy weed and you legalize it a handful of months before I move to Mexico? lmao ok.
But that’s not why I’m here.
Let’s talk about my mouth bones.
Earlier this week I went to the dentist for my broken front tooth.
To be clear, I broke my tooth last August. I’ve used dental wax to kinda cover the space but it’s clearly visible. I was already ashamed about my misaligned, absent and neglected (thanks to poverty) teeth. Now I want to disappear.
Please do not perceive my shameful existence.
I already knew the repair cost was out of my budget which is why I didn’t even bother with a consult. I’ll save the $69 and stock up on dental wax, kay thanks. The reason I made an appointment was because I was in bed at 2am the other night and it occurred to me that I hadn’t put my teeth in that day.
Did I not mention I wear a broken flipper to replace my missing teeth? lol my fault. If you don’t know, a flipper is what the dentist gives you as a temporary replacement until you’re fitted for dentures or a bridge. I’ve had mine for 20+ years and yes, yes it is in two pieces.
Robin, please be for real.
Anyway, at the very moment I realized my oversight, it occurred to me that I absolutely had an online meeting earlier that day, and…
….fuck my life.
The person was either extremely kind or too embarrassed on my behalf to mention it.
I scheduled a dental appointment the next day.
Estimate: $1200
I don’t have a clue how to pay for it. However, I need this done for my mental health. It’s started to impact my life in uncomfortable ways that I’m unable to ignore anymore. And believe me, I’m an expert at pretending to be unbothered by my chronic unmet basic needs. I’m unable to do it this time. But more importantly, I don’t want to anymore. I deserve care.
As for the ways it’s impacted my life, let’s talk about it.
My self confidence is trash
I don’t talk much and if I do, I awkwardly put my hand in front my face to hide my teeth. I rarely smile which breaks my heart because I love to smile! I have dope, forward thinking ideas to share with my voice but I don’t because, I’m too ashamed to open my mouth.
I don’t have romantic relationships
Ain’t no way I’d subject a partner to my current dental health. Which means that I don’t have sex. I’m in my 40’s, I’m at my sexual peak and I’m a triple fire sign. Triple. Fire. Sign. Don’t play with me. I’m aware that’s useless information to the majority of you. However if you know, you know. My fire fueled body has experienced an entire decade of sexual deprivation because of my damn teeth.
It adds stress to my already stressed out life
Do you know how many times I’ve had to sift though trash because I accidentally threw them away? Or how many times I’ve had to head back home because I blanked out and didn’t put them in? Or the constant fear that I’ll show up to a meeting and not realize I was sans teeth until after the…wait. Neva’ mind. Been there, done that.
All that to say, this shit sucks.
In Mexico I’ll be able to have this fixed for a third of the $22,000 I was quoted.
And this, my friends, is one of the many hidden impacts of poverty.
I can’t wait to smile again.
#PovertySucks
