A Life Of Crumbs

The "Crash Out" Edition

I married my ex-wife because she gave me an entire slice of cake.

And sis was fine.

She was the first person I’d ever dated that I was attracted to.

We met when I was 37. Before that, I was free game for any man who had an interest.

To be clear - I don’t like men.

“You wanna date me or just use me for sex?” Ok.

It’s violent to raise a Black girl in this hateful society without pouring into them, encouraging them, protecting them or surrounding them with people who can.

My stressed out Mom was focused on basic survival - affirming my worth wasn’t on her priority list. She kept me alive but it left me dead inside.

As I grew up, life consistently reminded me that I only deserved crumbs.

So when this beautiful woman said “you’re worthy of more” my heart broke open.

• Sure ok, she didn’t believe in compromise.

She has clear boundaries. That’s healthy, right?

• When I asked for care in a certain way she said “that’s not how I show love.”

That’s fair. You can’t control how a person loves you, right?

• Once she casually told me I was less of a priority than her clients.

Her work is important. That’s understandable, right?

Baby, the Ancestors stay concerned. None of this is ok.

It took me five years to realize that while she gave me was more than I had, it continued to be less than I deserved. (And I wasn’t the one to leave.)

No, I’m worthy of the entire cake. We all are.

On Tuesday that’s what I received.